Your main ideas are not off topic at all. You’ve organised your ideas and paragraphs very well. But some of your supporting points might less focused. For example, in your first body paragraph you are absolutely right to write about children becoming self absorbed which could continue into their adult life. This is relevant because the essay question is about a society of individuals. But your point about parents not being able to control them is not on topic – this is not about parental control, it’s about selfishness. Even with minor points lacking a bit of focus, it is still possible to hit band 7 in Task Response.
I took the ielts recently, and i forgot to paragraph the essay, and i only got a 7. Im repeating it now. Do you think that paragraphing alone will raise that 7 to a 7.5 or an 8?
436 Words Short Essay on Respect.A 5 paragraph essay on respect.
All essays will have an introduction and conclusion – that is 2 paragraphs already. The body of the essay MUST be divided into different body paragraphs (usually either 2 or 3). That makes 4 or 5 paragraphs in total.